Mouth and Tongue Issue... Do You Have Control Over Yours?

Proverbs 21:23  "Whoever guards his mouth and tongue keeps his soul from troubles."


The mouth and tongue issue...

Well I definitely struggle with saying things I should not, and I honestly don't know a person who doesn't say the wrong thing to others once in awhile. It's really the worst when I have said something to someone and I can't stop thinking about it and how mean or dumb they probably think I am, then when I finally get the courage to apologize to them, they don't even remember it! I just feel this great sense of relief though when it's all resolved and apologized for. I thank my God for convicting me of things I have probably been doing for years that I never paid any attention to. I cringe when I think back at how I used to talk in every day language. I think it stopped when I had my daughter Kayleigh, I never thought it was right to swear or talk with foul language around children so I pretty much stopped right when I had her. Then to my surprise I started to notice many parents who did not stop their bad language around children and it bothers me more than I can say. There also were a few young children I knew who would swear at adults which was shocking to me, but to the world this is nothing new. Nothing new at all. In fact, the Bible has something to say about that in Ecclesiastes 1:9 "What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun."



Now, back to my original Proverbs! Whoever guards his speech, words, tongue, mouth will keep his soul from troubles. It is an interesting connection that this makes between what comes out of our mouths and whether or not our soul has troubles. If people only knew, if they were only remotely aware of half the things they decide to say and the impact it has on themselves as well as others, I wonder if  they would think a little bit more. It's amazing how the world tries so very hard to cover up this fact and promote outspokenness and foul language. I'm not against freedom of speech at all here, but there are a lot of times where people's mouth's get them into more trouble than was worth. Everyone always wants to get the last word in, I know I used to be like that. I would not just quietly and meekly leave an argument, I HAD to be heard and I HAD to administer my 'closing arguments' to the other person no matter what! I probably considered myself to be quite a nice person, but if you were trying to tell me something I didn't want to hear or didn't agree with, I was going to let you know it. And I used to always interrupt people and be loud and obnoxious. I thought it was fun and I didn't care. Fun was the purpose of my existence, whatever I wanted to say, do or think I did just that. 


Over the past nearly 3 years however, the Lord Jesus Christ has radically done a work within my heart, soul and mind. I surrendered completely to Him and I didn't want to be in charge of my pathetic life anymore, so I started little by little giving Him more and more control of my life in different areas. One of those being guarding what I say. It's always tough to think very carefully before you blurt something out, but I'm sure there are some talented people who don't have a real problem with that at all. (Please teach the rest of us!) I think that learning to surrender what you say as a Christian can be extremely powerful because a lot of what we do say can ruin our testimony as far as what we say Christ has done in our lives (for those of you who are followers of Christ). I think this is where so much of the world calls us hypocrites and extremely judgmental, well they had to get those ideas from somewhere and I think that too many times Christians have opened their mouths out of perhaps anger, embarrassment, irritation, or to try and prove something and have given all Christians a bad name. That is why I find it extremely important to monitor what I say because I represent Christ in a fallen world that is used to filth, trash and unfiltered hurtful language. 


I just want to say to people who do not personally know Christ that if a professing Christian has ever verbally attacked you or judged you or said don't do something when they themselves have done that exact thing, please don't judge your perceptions of God based on that person's actions and behavior. None of us are perfect, and if anyone claims to be I would love to follow them around and see how they achieve perfection in their thoughts, actions and everything they do. No one person can do the right, perfect and holy things all day every single day except Jesus Christ. He was the only perfect person to walk this earth because He also is God. I need to be looking to His perfect example on how to speak to others because I myself, will always fall short. 


Ephesians 4:29 "Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear."
I love that verse because it is extremely clear as to the things we should be talking about as Christians. Now I have no doubt we should be using the Word of God to help people see the sin in their lives that they are accountable to God for (see my 'Eternity... What Matters' post) but in no way should we be trying to tear people down and spew venom out of our mouths. I think that it seems so normal to talk like that or hear language like that we don't realize it is like poison to us. 


James 1:26 "If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person's religion is worthless." 
This verse talks about just that, how if you are a Christian and you are trying to tell another person about the saving knowledge of Christ and you do not control or bridle your tongue, everything else you have said is worth nothing. That is a pretty serious problem if you would love nothing more than for another person to be saved by the grace of God. 

James 3:2-6 "For we all stumble in many ways. And if anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle his whole body. If we put bits into the mouths of horses so that they obey us, we guide their whole bodies as well. Look at the ships also: though they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are guided by a very small rudder wherever the will of the pilot directs. So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things. And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell."

                                                 
This analogy the Bible makes is very well done and makes it fairly simple to apply God's truth to our lives in practical ways. We all stumble in many ways, and Christians are definitely no different. Everyone has areas in their lives they need to let God work on and surrendering things to Him you think you can do yourself is no small task. It takes a constant decision of giving up control to Him and letting Him work things out. It actually took me awhile to understand fully what that meant, and that I no longer had to do things on my own. I was so used to trying to fix things, trying to mend things, trying to accomplish things and trying to make things happen; but the key word in all of those is 'trying.' Things never really went well when I was in charge of my own life, I was in a dark place I really saw no way out of. Then one amazing day, someone shared with me how valuable I was to Christ and that He wanted a personal relationship with me and He wanted to handle everything and help me to make decisions and not do anything on my own. 


In James, I really enjoy the ship analogy because it gives a very clear picture of something so huge (like a giant ship) being controlled by a tiny rudder. It sort of puts into perspective just how powerful our tongues and what we can can be, we can use it to build people up and allow blessings in our lives or we can use our tongues to tear other people down with our lives crashing to the ground right along with them. Digging into these verses really gets me thinking, or wanting to think, more purposefully about the things I say and how they may be harming others or myself. 

And I'll leave you with one more verse...

1 Peter 3:8-11  "Finally, all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another; love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be courteous; not returning evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary blessing, knowing that you were called to this, that  you may inherit a blessing. For he who would love life and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips from speaking deceit. Let him turn away from evil and do good; let him seek peace and pursue it."  


  

-Alisha